Some things never change

I used to hate flying. I was terrified of planes, didn't like the stress that came with airport security checkpoints, and really didn't like spending $4 for a bottle of water.

In fact, on my first flight to Alabama as a CDC, I nearly had a breakdown because we only arrived 50 minutes before our flight took off (the horror!). We made that plane, and throughout the rest of the year, I navigated canceled flights, long security lines, and getting to the airport with under an hour until my flight.

Somewhere along the tens of thousands of miles I traveled, airports became my "me" place. They were where I treated myself to Starbucks, caught up on blogs, watched Hulu, worked on reports. And planes, the things I used to be the most afraid of, became my place to enjoy a good book or write thank you notes.

The airports and planes were my routine. In a year where I felt like nothing was constant, the traveling was something that never changed.

So here I am now, sitting in the Jacksonville Airport, with my first flight delayed and a pretty good chance that I'll miss both my booked connection and the back-up connection that my new Delta agent friend Kareem just helped me get on, and I'm at peace. I don't know if I'm going to be sleeping in my bed or on an airport bench tonight, but I feel pretty okay.

Nearly two years later, I am sitting here, catching up on blogs, drinking an Iced Passion Tea, and smiling because even though so much is different about my life and who I am, some things never change.

You are always wearing your letters (part II)

My blog originally started as a way for me to keep track of my travels around the country for Delta Gamma Fraternity. The year took me all over the United States, from Montana to Texas to California and, you guessed it, Maryland.

I've sat here and tried to pen my thoughts about the negative press DG has been getting today, but I think I'm going to do this instead:

In any and all cases, bad or sensational news spreads more quickly than good. So instead of giving more press-time to the negative, I think maybe it's more appropriate to let you see some of the good our 146 chapters are doing.

Our University of Oregon chapter raises over $30,000 each year for Service for Sight during Anchor Splash: http://dailyemerald.com/2013/04/18/greek-uo-delta-gamma-sororitys-anchor-splash-philanthropy-one-of-most-successful-in-the-nation-anchor/

Then there's our chapter at UNR: http://nevadasagebrush.com/blog/2013/04/08/dg-hosts-yearly-charity-event/

Beta Psi at the University of Alabama will also be fundraising this weekend: http://www.al.com/entertainment/index.ssf/2013/04/alabamas_delta_gamma_sorority.html

 And each of our chapters also volunteers within their community: http://www.patriottalon.com/pulse/article_b1a0b6d6-9b0a-11e2-84c0-001a4bcf6878.html

And finally at the University of Richmond: http://thecollegianur.com/2013/03/28/dg-volleyball-tournament-raises-money-for-visually-impaired/33705/

I've said it in this blog over and over again: Fraternity and sorority life is about way more than partying. Started as a way for women to work together to become educated, sorority life has been, is, and will continue to be an integral and rewarding part of college for young women across the country.

For me, Delta Gamma absolutely played a major part in my development as a leader, friend, scholar, volunteer, and human being in general. My experience was about growing in my studies, service, and relationships and about becoming the woman I am today.

I think as fraternity and sorority members, we have an obligation to protect and spread all of the good things Greek life can be. And really, it just comes down to this:

In everything you say and in everything you do, you are always wearing your letters.

For Hope.

"Ours is an associate sisterhood based upon sincere desire for mutual improvement; its cementing element is love, its stimulating principle, truth; its watchword, duty..."

-Anna Boyd Ellington, first initiation address

When I read Anna Boyd's first initiation address, the quote above sticks out to me, because it's everything the Fraternity is about: choosing each other, supporting each other, succeeding together, remembering that we are accountable to one another.



I am reminded as we celebrate our founding - 139 years ago, during Christmastime, 1873 - of all of the wonderful things Delta Gamma has done for me throughout my six years of membership. My best friends, confidence, and the ability to understand people rank among the top of my list, but I am certain that I could go on for days.

This blog started as a way for me to document my journey as a Collegiate Development Consultant for Delta Gamma. It was, by far, the most challenging and fulfilling year of my life. I was moved to tears on a weekly basis, and I felt like my work was impactful.

As I traveled the country, I met thousands of college aged women, and as I learned from them, I learned about myself and about the organization I worked for.

I think what I am most thankful for the continuous improvement and learning that Delta Gamma has afforded me over the last six years. During a time in life when everything seems to change, DG has remained a constant source of friendship, hope, and inspiration, and I think that's pretty special.

Happy 139 years, Delta Gamma. Can't wait to see what the rest of my membership holds.

On DG, Greek Life, and Convention

Last weekend, I was blessed to be able to attend Delta Gamma's 65th International Biennial Convention in Indianapolis. It was truly one of the highlights of my Delta Gamma experience, and a great way to revisit my year as a CDC. I got to see many of the presidents I worked with over the year, meet the president of our chapter at the University of Virginia (where I will be taking on the role of ATC), catch up with fellow CDCs, and gain further appreciation for being a Delta Gamma - an organization that I chose to be a part of, and one that in turn chose me.

Look, Steph, you made the blog!!

Greek Life has the potential to change lives because it adds something to the undergraduate experience of men and women across the country. Let's be honest, if it did not offer something beyond partying, it would not still be relevant on our campuses.

I don't think I've posted on this before, so I'm going to do it now, in part as an answer to a challenge issued by Circle of Sisterhood founder Ginny Carroll during her speech at Convention. She challenged us to share with others why Delta Gamma meant as much as it did to us, and to share the moment when we were proudest to be a Delta Gamma.

One of my proudest moments as a Delta Gamma was when I returned to our Gamma Xi chapter at Texas Tech University in the Spring. I had visited the chapter in the fall and had had a really wonderful experience with the women, making a lot of connections and really enjoying my time in Lubbock. When I arrived in March, the chapter gave me a standing ovation, and I was greeted with hugs and smiles. The outpouring of love, support, and true sisterhood (despite these women having only known me for one week) was overwhelming.

The truth is, I have a lot of proud DG moments because DG has had such an impact on my life. I honestly believe that the organization has given me leadership and teamwork skills that I would not have been able to learn elsewhere, and I can say that members of my organization - collegiate and alumni alike- have shaped me into a person I am proud to be.

I believe that Greek organizations are capable of being catalysts for change and for good on college campuses, should collegiate members embrace the values that their organizations offer. I know because I have seen (and have been moved to tears by) it on campuses all over the country - large, small, public, private, you name it.

Delta Gamma, and other Greek organizations, remain relevant not because of the drinking, the partying, the hazing, but because they teach young adults how to live with values and purpose. They offer a secure, supportive setting in which 18-23 year-olds can grow as students, as leaders, and as friends. They are places in which young women and men and built up, encouraged to push their limits, and comforted during hard times.

What's more is that they offer a network of other members that span generational and geographical gaps. I have been inspired by Delta Gammas in collegiate chapters in Montana, Colorado, Maryland, Texas, Ohio, Florida... just to name a few, and by women at many different stages of life. I have learned and grown from their experiences in the organization.

There is truly no other subset of organization that offers quite the same experience.

If you're Greek, what's your proudest Greek moment? And if you're not, when have you seen a Greek organization at their best or worst?

What do you value?

thanks, pinterest.

What  do you value? Seems like a pretty easy question, no?

This year, I’ve made it my goal to talk about values everywhere I go. Whether it’s how to recruit women based on values or how to live by Delta Gamma’s values, I’m always trying to get the women that I meet to think about what this six letter word, values, really means.

Why? Because what we value defines who we are. Because what we value isn’t just communicated through what we say, it’s communicated in our every day activities. Our values are determined by what we do, say, and think.

And because somebody who knows what they value, and who strives to live their values, is unstoppable.

Some things I value? Honesty. Integrity. Compassion. Health. Happiness. Friendship. Respect. Learning. Teamwork. Forgiveness.

But it’s not just enough to tell people what you value. After all, corporations, politicians, organizations… many fail when what they do does not align with what they say they stand for. And the same fate could befall sororities and fraternities.

We say we stand for friendship, but then we talk about each other behind closed doors.

We say we stand for honesty, but then we lie about why we’re missing a meeting.

We say we stand for integrity, but then we take the extra t-shirt that someone left in the common area.

What’s that song? A little less talk, a lot more action?

What separates fraternities and sororities from other campus organizations is their ability to provide a values-based experience. It’s what has kept us relevant for over a hundred years. It’s why young women and men can be transformed over the course of their college experience.

Because that unquantifiable deeper meaning you get from life once you know what you stand for? It pushes you to be that better version of yourself. It gives you purpose and drive and breeds passion. It helps you to inspire others to find their deeper meaning too.

And that, for lack of a better word, is just awesome.

Catching up: from Las Cruces to Lubbock

So here I am again, having promised you several blogs, playing catch up. Here’s what you’ve missed:

A week in Las Cruces, where I ate a lot of green chili (um, delicious), saw some sweet mountains, and got a view of Mexico! I met some wonderful women, was a guest speaker at Founders Day, and saw my first college baseball game of the season.

   

From there, I headed to Sarasota, Florida to watch the Orioles in Spring Training. This was my first Spring Training experience, but my dad and I have already decided that we’re going to make it a regular thing. We got to see the Orioles tie with the Red Sox and beat the Yankees! Plus, I recognized some of the rookies from working with Georgia Baseball, which is always exciting. Can you believe opening day is so soon?!

 

 

And then, I made my way to Delta Gamma’s oldest chapter – Eta, at the University of Akron. I really loved getting to spend the week in Ohio, especially with this group of women! I got to attend their Mother-Daughter Day, meet with alumnae, attend a cookout at a neighboring fraternity house, and bond closely with their chapter president, Danielle. They also included me in one of their chapter’s traditions, called Watershed. I also ate Chipotle twice in a week.

  

Finally, I got to reconnect with the women of Gamma Xi-Texas Tech for a week! When I arrived, I was greeted by a chapter standing and applauding/cheering, which, of course, made me cry. That’s how I am – I get moved to tears. It’s fine. I got to present to the chapter, meet with officers, attend a baseball game, eat some really delicious things, bawl at both Inspiration and Initiation, and really just catch up with a group of women who I’ve missed since October. Plus, I got to shamelessly listen to “Texas Country…” read: all the Josh Abbott Band I ever wanted to listen to :)

There’s your recent summary. Tomorrow, be on the lookout for an update on my running life!

“How do you deal with negative stereotypes?”

One of the questions I am most often asked on the road is: “How do you deal with negative stereotypes having to do with Greek Life?”

My answer is always a follow-up question (I may be the most frustrating CDC on the planet – they just want an answer!): “Do you think those stereotypes are true?”

I remember discussing stereotypes in an entry level Journalism class in college. The part the stuck out most to me? Stereotypes are generally founded on some nugget of truth.

Leaders in fraternities and sororities complain that the media gets it wrong; that so much emphasis is placed on partying, hazing, not living out values, and that all of the wonderful things we do are all but ignored. While this may be true (see: TLC’s one episode of Sorority Girls), the fact of the matter is, in order for these things to be covered by the media, they had to have happened.

Of course sororities do more than party. Of course we do. We do thousands and thousands of hours of community service, boast higher GPAs than the campus average, host educational programs for our members, shape women into leaders. And hazing? Every NPC organization is 100% anti-hazing.

But here’s the thing: it takes one person representing one organization having one bad night out or making one mistake to counteract all the good that fraternities and sororities as a whole do. In order for the media to write bad things, those bad things had to have happened.

Of course members are going to make mistakes; college is part of growing up and part of growing up is making mistakes. But once you join a Greek letter organization, you’re held to a higher standard and higher scrutiny because of everything you represent. Because you, and I, represent over  a hundred years of heritage, hundreds of thousands of members, millions of philanthropy hours, and established values and ideals. We communicate everything our organizations stand for in our actions every day.

Delta Zeta put out an awesome, awesome video that members of fraternities and sororities everywhere should watch. It’s here for you now:

So, how do you deal with negative stereotypes of Greek organizations? The answer to that question is best communicated through actions, not words.

New Jersey, new state.

Surprise! I am writing tonight from snowy New Jersey – a new state in my travels this year.

Well, I guess technically not, since I visited Princeton and Edison over my winter break, but none-the-less, it is still a new state in Delta Gamma-land for me.

If you’ve been following my sidebar, you know that today was supposed to be my first day at Lafayette College in Easton, PA. I did make it to Easton, plopped my bags down in my new room, observed this pretty neat conference for all of the leaders on their campus, and then packed an over night bag for a quick trip to the Garden State.

I’ll be helping with a recruitment workshop tomorrow, and then head back to Easton at night.

This job has definitely added some spontaneity to my life, and I am learning to enjoy the process and live more in the moment. Today that means I am getting excited to meet new women and see another college campus – Rutgers!

Here’s to hoping I have time to take photos!

Why I love bid day

It’s January 15th, and it is bid day at Epsilon Lambda, where we welcomed 31 new members! It’s also the third bid day I have gotten to experience during my year as a CDC, and let me tell you – it never gets old.

Obviously, I have to share my bid day highlight – bid day 2010 at the University of Georgia, when my sister and I became “sisters times two.” Following a long two weeks as vp: membership, I was so excited to see my for real little sister, Amanda, walk off the bus and onto the Delta Gamma front lawn.

I love bid day because, to me, it is the epitome of everything our Fraternity stands for. Bid day, as it turns out, is all about friendship. It is a celebration of new beginnings – of women joining an organization which will give them memories, bridesmaids, best friends – and a celebration of renewal and rededication. At bid day, women who are already members are reminded of the purpose of the organization they have already pledged themselves to. They grow closer to those they have already made connections with, and expand their circle of friendship to include new women who share their interests and values.

It is a night full of smiles (and tears of happiness, if you are like me), of excitement, of relief. Adding new members to our organizations is why we exist, and while the process of getting there might be stressful at times, the result is always worth the stress and hard work it took to get there.

The purpose of Greek life is often debated; members will argue our purpose is philanthropy or scholarship or leadership. While all of those things are true, I believe my founders (and those of other Greek organizations) formed their club simply because they were friends, and they wanted to find others who valued the same things they did. Friendship, above all else, is what Greek life offers. Philanthropy, scholarship, leadership – all of these things are achieved through genuine friendship arising from mutual respect of one another.

I have another bid day to look forward to this semester (at Beta Sigma-Maryland!), and I am already looking forward to the smiles, the screams, the songs, and the tears.

Hello from the Lehigh Valley

Yesterday, after a delay in Columbus, a holding pattern over Philly, and a prop plane into the Allentown-Bethlehem Airport, I finally arrived at my first visit for the spring semester – Lehigh University in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania!

I’m here at our Epsilon Lambda chapter until next Saturday. The women have been very welcoming, and I’ve already gotten to experience two delicious meals out! I got to eat brunch this morning at Blue Sky, which is apparently a Bethlehem favorite, and then got to share a “plain pie (cheese pizza, for all of you non-Northerners)" with EVC late tonight as they were finishing their bid list.

SIDENOTE: Can we just talk about how I ate the best breakfast sandwich I have ever eaten in my entire life today? Cream cheese, local bacon, eggs, and apple on sun-dried tomato focaccia bread. Sounds weird, but I totally wish I could re-create it every day of my life. THAT good. No, really. If you’re ever in Bethlehem, check out Blue Sky Cafe.

DOUBLE SIDENOTE: Can we also talk about all of the delicious things I have eaten on the road? Salsa made tableside, today’s delicious breakfast sandwich, In n’ Out burger, sushi in Miami, another delicious burger in Minnesota… Definitely going to use this blog to talk about all the amazing things I eat. Perks of CDC living. Go home bigger?

This morning, I got to give myself a mini running tour of the campus (look at me counteracting all of those deeeelicious calories). My half marathon training plan called for 3 miles, so I suited up in running tights, three layers on top, my Redskins ear warmers, thermal gloves, and set off. Let me tell you, 30 degrees is no joke.

You know what else isn’t a joke? Hills. Hoooooly hills. Lehigh is actually situated on a hill (some of the chapter members informed me that the University pretty much owns the whole mountain), so I ran up and down hills and steps and took in some of the scenery this campus has to offer.

One thing I love most about the northern United States is the beautiful stone work. Seriously. The buildings up here are so gorgeous, and I am certain if I went to school here, I would spend hours taking it all in. I’m definitely looking forward to some more runs around campus, although a sweet collegian offered me a three day gym pass! Hooray for treadmill runs and weights!

Tomorrow is Bid Day here, and I am excited to post about it! It feels like Christmas Eve, and I think I’m just as eager as the collegians to get the list of Delta Gamma’s newest members!

Well, maybe not just as eager, but it’s certainly a close call.

OH-IO

Extraordinary. If I had to describe my coworkers (the 10 other CDCs!), my boss, and the rest of my sisters that I met at Officer's Training this weekend in one word, extraordinary would be it!

It is amazing to me what can happen when you get the positive energy of 200ish women together in one place for three days. After OTS, I am sure that all of us left with ideas of how to better our Fraternity and lead through example, hard work, and optimism. More importantly, we left with the resources we need to make positive change happen.

Delta Gamma does not settle. The Fraternity is not complacent, and I was blown away by all of the incredible ideas and new initiatives we heard about over the last three days. I would share all of it here, but then I'd probably have to kill you. Kidding! But really, you're just going to have to be patient, and keep checking out http://www.deltagamma.org/ for lots of new and exciting things!

The other thing I learned this weekend (besides the wealth of information, of course!) was that a national organization like Delta Gamma doesn't run without the hundreds of volunteers who give so much of their time, energy, and love. If you're a sorority woman reading my blog, make sure you thank your advisers (local, regional, and national) for all they do -- they're not paid, and without them, your organization ceases to exist.

So, in closing, I want to thank a few of my advisers who have encouraged me and led me to be extraordinary. Dawn, Amber, Tiffany, and, of course, my mom and dad -- thank you for never letting me settle, and for putting in the time, energy, and love it took to help me achieve my goals for me, my chapter, and my Fraternity. I hope that over the next year I can be as inspiring as you were to me.